Sometimes It's Hard to Be Nice

January 1, 2021

K-Gr 4-When your cousin comes over and takes the toy you want to play with, and when you get it back, it's broken-it's really hard to be nice. Adults and children have grappled with patience, acquiescence, and tolerance-it's the lesson of 2020! This book takes the topic apart, with gentle solutions for the young Black girl, or the white red-headed boy who has to go to his sister's recital; and to add insult to injury, she kisses him for attending. Various characters are beset by situations that are hard to tolerate, one after the other, but sometimes the provocateur is a baby brother, who is ripping pages out of a book and is just too young to know better. The older sister, bespectacled, with light brown skin, calls him a name and then cleans up. Rudd has her finger on the pulse of this social-emotional lesson, and gives the problems their due. The illustrations enhance the litany, in cheerful colors and a flat style that doesn't skimp on facial expressions showing anger, disappointment, fear, and happiness. Readers will relate to the authentic events unfolding and also receive clear instructions for some coping behavior. The author enhances the conceit. Being nice is not an accident, it takes practice. It means courage in the face of potential bullies, and it means swallowing fears and facing the funny-smelling home where your grandfather lives. VERDICT A pleasant, important book for this age group, giving them words and actions to smooth the course of their days.-Kimberly Olson Fakih, School Library Journal

Copyright 2021 School Library Journal, LLC Used with permission.

February 1, 2021
What does it mean to be nice? And does being nice equal doing the right thing? This book attempts to share lessons in social-emotional learning but misses the mark in a few places. In the opening scene, a child is sad that a visiting cousin takes a treasured toy robot to play with. He breaks it, and the text notes that "sometimes being nice is really hard." In another scene, a different child is given a plate of tuna noodle casserole. To spare Grandma's feelings, the kid chokes it down. This behavior may seem nice on the surface, but this dishonesty does not help Grandma or the child. In a final example, a third youngster waits in line for the slide when another kid jumps the line. The child who was waiting patiently is told by Mom to let the other kid go first. Disregarding this instruction, the waiting child takes their rightful turn on the slide anyway, but "somehow it isn't as fun." The second-person narration continues, "Next time you'll let him go first." The book offers some feel-good examples of "nice" behavior, but overall, it paints the unfortunate picture that being nice means suffering for the sake of someone else's feelings or, worse, their poor behavior. O'Neill supplies bland, stiff scenes featuring a cast of racially diverse children of multiple gender presentations. The focus on being "nice" in lieu of genuine kindness, honesty, respect, and sharing makes this a less-than-nice read. (Picture book. 3-7)

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February 15, 2021
Preschool-Grade 2 Finally, a book that discusses children's feelings and emotions about being uncomfortable. Life is not about always getting what you want, a difficult concept for young children, who, as a result, will need to learn patience, kindness, sharing, and courage. This book helps children address their emotions about having to do the right thing, even when they don't want to. Simple phrases and repetitive language introduce a variety of examples that demonstrate why being nice is sometimes difficult, like when you have to go to your sibling's dance recital instead of playing outside, and how being nice can take practice. Crisp digital illustrations depict an array of emotions, from happy to mad to uneasy, on the faces of the cartoon kids, who appear in familiar school, home, and outdoor settings. Children in the early grades will easily relate to the feelings and emotions presented here. Similar titles include Fran Pintadera's Why Do We Cry? (2020), Carmen Agra Deedy's Rita and Ralph's Rotten Day (2020), and Andy Rash's The Happy Book (2019).

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